A few days ago, not being sure of what to post on my new blog, I included an excerpt from my very first published story. I think I wrote it about 8 years ago. At the time, especially when it was published on Discipline and Desire, I was so excited and proud.
I still am, but when I re-read it a few days ago, I was a little bit embarrassed too. Parts of it made me cringe. I suppose I could have edited it for the post, but that seemed deceitful because if anyone bought my book, they'd see that the story as printed there would be different from the edited version on the blog. I know...I'm probably the only one who cares about that sort of thing, but I do and it's my blog, so there.
It's sort of like looking back at photos from high school, especially the ones that you thought made you look really good at the time and now realizing that you looked hideous. I'm sure you didn't look hideous. You were probably attractive all the time, but I looked hideous and I'm sure that any of your friends who were also in the picture with you looked hideous (especially in comparison to your loveliness). :)
As much as parts of that first story make me cringe, I also look at it in much the same way that I look at my high school self---with a little bit of compassion for who that person was at the time and with a little bit of pride that I've moved on from there.
What about you? Do you throw away those horrible pictures (or stories) from the past, or do you think of them as little reminders of where you've been?
Always keep them, they are great touchstones to show growth and change. Just like the old pictures I keep them and view them, always with the knowledge that at that moment, I did the best I could with what I knew. Usually ;-)
ReplyDeleteI have fragments of stories that I started and never finished. I picked one of these up the other day and used the idea to start a new story.
CB