Welcome everyone to the first meeting of the Spanking Story Book Club. Hope you are all comfortable. Of course, my living room is clean and comfortable and fully stocked with an assortment of home made goodies for us to enjoy while we talk about good books.
Today, and for the next several Fridays, we're going to talk about Body Politics by Cara Bristol.
I know all of you might not have had time to get the book or start reading, so let's start with a couple of general questions for discussion.
First---what's in a name? I'm horrible at coming up with names for characters, but one thing I noticed about the characters in Body Politics is their names. The heroine is Stephanie, a dyed in the wool, bra burning feminist. But, the name Stephanie is, to me, very feminine. She doesn't refer to herself as Steph or even Stevie. Is this the author's way of telling us that Stephanie might actually be more feminine than she'd like the rest of the world to believe? Or is this just a random coincidence?
Mark, is the strong, dominant hero. His name is short and to the point, but with a hard K---those names are so sexy.
Would the book be the same if the main characters were Stevie and Maurice?
Next question---the premise of the book is that Stephanie and Mark are set up on a blind date. Mark is a member of the Rod and Cane Society, a group of men who spank their wives/girlfriends. Stephanie is unaware of the group's existence or that Mark is a member.
In a dating situation, how soon should a spanko reveal their lifestyle? Do you get it out there on the table right away or wait until you've actually formed a relationship and then bring it up?
And if these questions aren't of interest to you---feel free to talk about something else about the book or spanking stories in general.
Interesting questions about the names! I did choose Mark because it's short, masculine and hard-sounding. When I pick names for heroes, I consider how they would sound while gasped in passion. With Stephanie...the name just came to me. It is a derivative of a man's name -- Stephen. Does that make it more feminine?
ReplyDeleteThe revelation of kink or any significant personal info (family/heath issues) is a hard one. Too soon and you might scare away someone who might have been accepting once they got to know you, too late and the person might feel blindsided.
In Body Politics, Mark's past history with his ex wife, makes him want to get everything out in the open at the onset.
I finished reading the book already! I even read the sex scenes! Do I get extra credit? :D
ReplyDeleteFunny about Stephanie. To me, it's not so much feminine as it's a full proper name rather than a nickname. I would see a nickname as softer, more approachable, etc. (Kat vs. Katherine, for example) I like what Cara says about it being derived from a male name, but aren't most names?
It reminds me of that song about a boy named Sue and how names that go against expectations can be stronger than a name that does go with expectations.
When I was choosing my penname, since I was naming myself, I deliberately chose a first name or surname that was not a male derivative. I did not want to be an Alexandra Carlson, for example.
DeleteIt's funny how even a "fake" name can have real-life implications. I have a certain image of you that is influenced by a real-life Cara who has been nearly a lifelong friend. It's not a super-popular name, and so those associations carry over even though you are different people.
DeleteI chose "Vitsky" because I genuinely though I had made up the name (as I make up most of my characters' last names). I didn't want a name associated with a certain race or ethnicity. Imagine my disappointment when I found out that there are people with the same last name and that it is Russian!
Plus, I can't write my own last name without putting in a typo half the time. :)
I think Mark was a perfect name for him, it just really worked. And after reading the book I don't think I could picture him with any other name. In regard to Stephanie I preferred the nickname that Mark gave her..so sweet!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Cara about the revelation of personal information, it really is risky at best.
I kind of liked "Kitten." :-) What's significant there ...is that Stephanie hated the nickname Amazon. So Mark respected her wishes and did not call her that. But though she protested that she didn't like the name Kitten, she really did, and he knew that.
DeleteKitten is great. It's sweet and soft, but can also have claws, so it makes a wonderful "pet name" (pardon the pun).
DeleteI finished reading Body Politics last night. Loved it!
ReplyDeleteI think in a dating situation, it's tricky deciding whether or not to reveal you're a spanko right away. On the one hand, it can save heartache by revealing your secret early on. If the person you're dating has no interest whatsosever and a spanking relationship is a must have for you, at least you'll know early on. On the other hand, it seems smart to wait a while and get to know someone better before sharing your spanko secret. You think "maybe if they know me better, they'll be more open to my lifestyle."
I admire how Mark was straightforward with Stephanie from the get-go. That's how I prefer it to go real life, anyway. :)
Good Morning Everyone! Thanks for being part of the discussion.
ReplyDeleteI guess I had a personal reason for asking about when to reveal a kink. When I was doing a lot of online dating I had several phone conversations with a man and we really hit it off and I even told him about my writing. He was very enthusiastic and then revealed his kink and what a large role it played in his life.
I asked why he'd revealed something like that so early on and he said that a few months before he'd met a woman that he really liked and vice versa and after a few weeks he revealed his kink and she was horrified and it all ended badly.
In Body Politics, Mark notes different things about Stephanie that make him think she's a natural submissive (nervous tics, chewed nails) so it doesn't seem like it comes out of nowhere when he believes she might be agreeable to a spanking relationship.
I went on a date with bearded man years ago. He revealed on the first date that he had a skin condition and that's why he'd grown the beard -- to cover it up. I spent the rest of the evening wondering what he looked like underneath the hair.
DeleteI bet that wasn't one of those good "I wonder what he looks like without that" fantasies.
DeleteLOL, Celeste!
DeleteI think the names are perfect. Like Cara, a male derivative for this particular character would feel off some. Stephanie has spunk and her feminist champion character feeds her storied vision. As per the bearded thought above here, I do not have a beard, nothing to hide but the paddle I carry in the breast pocket of my suit at times.....
ReplyDeleteJoseph, your comment about the paddle in your pocket made me giggle.
DeleteI've finished reading the book also. Really enjoyed. I don't particularly think Stephanie is a feminist name. When I am writing the female character names just usually come to me. However, the male character I have to think about. I like a masculine name, something that denotes strength. I can't think I would feel the same about Maurice - that sounds to feminine to me.
ReplyDeleteAs for coming out too soon, I think that depends on whether it is something you really want to could do w/o. Too soon might scare someone away but if it is "must" than why waste time if the other party is not, nor ever going to be into it. It's a fine line and think it has more to do with instinct than anything else.
I think Mark did it well, he knew what he wanted and I think Liz's part had a lot to do with it too. She knew everything and thought it would be a good fit.
I'm the discussion leader and I haven't finished the book. Yikes!
DeleteI think that's a good point about how important it is to you. In the example I gave about the man I met, this was a major part of his life---most of his friends were involved in the lifestyle etc.
I thought that Mark sharing his lifestyle with her was also a sign of trust. Even though Rod and Cane was more accepted in the community, given his high profile job (and being a public employee) this information in the wrong hands could have had a bad outcome for him.
I don't see Stephanie as a feminist name because it does come from the male name Stephen. But (unless we're authors!), we don't get to choose our names. Stephanie's parents named her that! LOL.
DeleteMark did take a big chance by telling Stephanie about Rod and Cane. She could have ruined his career.
DeleteThat is an interesting thought. Names are really important and I like the choices. Mark is a good strong name. But Stephanie is very feminine but proper.
ReplyDeleteI am surprised at how soon Mark said anything about the spanking society. Don't want to sound sexist but maybe men are more comfortable about being into spankings.
That's an interesting point, Blondie. If a man tells his friends that he spanks his wife, is he likely to be subjected to the same possible criticism as a woman who submits? I have a feeling that they aren't, but I don't know.
DeleteAny men out there want to weigh in on this?
He took a big risk, but Mark didn't want to invest in a relationship only to find out it couldn't progress. Possibly he could have waited a little longer, but he wanted to get everything out in the open.
DeleteGreat discussion. I think names denote certain personalities. I agree that Mark is a strong masculine name and Stephanie makes me think soft and strong not sure why....Since my profession is one where I come across hundreds of names a day...lol I am either influenced positively or negatively by a name. That is why picking names for stories is hard for me.
ReplyDeleteAs to revealing your kink early in a relationship...I guess it would depend on how important the kink is. I have a husband who didn't consider himself a spanko..but spanked---we never talked about it. Now after talking about it and even experimenting, he would never 'labe'l himself. But I will tell you from his "response" UM...he is....! So back to the question....I think it has to be situational. If you can not have a relationship without it gently start from the first.
A professor of a human sexuality class I took in college said that sex is easier to do than it is to talk about. Perhaps the same is true of spanking?
DeleteI apologise for being late to this class. Who do I give the late note to?
ReplyDeleteI think names have a big part in forming a character. I’m a big believer in seeing a baby’s face before making a final decision on a name. The name has to fit the person.
Ok now I’m off to buy the book and read it so I can really take part in the discussion next time :)
I'm always going to be late to class! I think you all are talking while I'm sleeping!!
ReplyDeleteNames - I just started this book so here's my two cents. The names are straightforward. Mark and Stephanie, perfect, no BS, no frills. Works for me.
I love the fact that Mark notices right away that Stephanie isn't wearing high heels. And I love that she didn't wear high heels - was it on purpose on her part or subconscious? (First scene if no one knows what the heck I'm talking about). It's a great insight for the reader that Stephanie is more feminine (can I say traditional) than she maybe wants to be or believes herself to be. Like I said, I'm just starting so maybe this view changes as I progress into the book.
Oh one more thing - real quick question for Celeste - I will likely forget to drop by on Fridays. Will you post that the discussion is going on on FB or somewhere? Send me a special invite?? ;) ok, you don't need to send me a special invite...
Good point about the heels on the boots. It's those little things, isn't it?
DeleteI'll be sure to remind you on FB!
I think sooner is better than later. I remember letting my husband know a month into our dating. Our relationship was on fast forward anyway, so it wasn't a big leap. It took me 9 years though to be ready and able to tell him about my desire for DD. I do think if its important to you it's best to let your partner know early on. I was surprised at just how forward Mark was, especially taking her to a Rod & Cane event.
ReplyDelete